Calling Just to Say 'Hi'
by Hikou no Kokoro
Summary: Kanda has always been an anti-social person, rarely even thinking about the "friends" he has. But one day, that has to change. Starting with a cell phone. Gift-fic for Kit-chan, my lovely little writer-in-crime! AU, no yaoi.


**Happy [one day late] Birthday, Kit-chan~! I know, I FINALLY post this . . .**

**Anyway, this is for the li'l adorable Kit-chan, my li'l adorable writer-in-crime. :3 Ever since we first started, she has been my partner in many fics. There hasn't been one chapter fic that I haven't written with her. She does great fillers and transition chapters - I don't know if I can write things without her! . . . Maybe, I can fit her in a little baggie so I can bring her around and take her out when I need some transitions . . . *3* . . . Nah, she's probably going to kill me in the process . . . So, anyway! Happy birthday! I hope your birthday was memerable! And keep writing!**

**Now please enjoy this simple AU~!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own DGM. Nor do I own Yu Kanda, Lavi, Allen, Lenalee Lee, or Alma Karma.**

* * *

><p>Calling Just to Say Hi<p>

"Love taken \ and for \ wishes granted.  
>Love \ and \ wishes<br>taken \ for \ granted."

—ChloroformBoy from DeviantArt

'_Lavi, please go to—"_

The college graduate looks up from the shady note, scratching the back of his head as he wonders who it is from. He doesn't recognize the address, but is quite certain that it's a building near his neighborhood; it's just a ten minute walk. But, he doesn't even know why he is following the directions on the paper in the first place! Not only that, he is quite disappointed by the content. Being the type of person that he is, he had expected something . . . different.

After all, this is Lavi. A redhead genius who loves pranks and has a pervert streak.

When he had gotten back to his apartment, he saw his mailbox overstuffed with paper. He had expected a few more letters than usual, since it's his birthday today. Knowing his friends, they would try to send him birthday cards and a small gift to him. Well, everyone except a Japanese high school student, of course. But, even with those explanations, Lavi hadn't expected so many papers in his mailbox that corners were sticking out from the sides of the mail door.

Lavi, being the love-sick fool, had thought that all these notes were love letters from hot secret-admirers. Excitedly, he opened the door and all the notes started tumbling down to his feet like a waterfall. And this, of course, raised his hopes and enthusiasm. It was probably the best birthday "gift" that he had received since his was . . . Well, he doesn't remember – all the birthdays were great, especially since he was able to get away with a few pranks.

Lavi had hummed to himself as he sifted through the many sheets of paper, organizing the mail into the "notes" and the actual mail. He slipped the mail into the mailbox, planning to read them later. For some odd reason, Lavi couldn't find any cards from his friends – maybe it was somewhere in the notes, or the mail wasn't fast enough to have it make it on his birthday. Then, Lavi took the ads and simply tossed them into the trash bin nearby or the recycling bin.

Finally, Lavi was able to separate all the notes from the mail. Lavi grinned, rubbing his hands together excitedly. He noticed that other residences in his apartment were staring, but they simply sighed, recognizing the redhead, and walked away. So, he just ignored all of them and picked up the first note, muttering, "All right now . . . Let's see what all of these say . . ."

There was no stamp, and no address. Lavi blinked, shrugging as he began to read the content. Unfortunately, it wasn't as long as he had expected.

'_Lavi, please go to . . .' _the note instructed.

He raised an eyebrow as he read it again. _That certainly is strange . . . I guess this isn't from a secret-admirer . . ._ he thought, tossing the note away. He had other things to do. He's a busy man, after all.

So, the redhead opened another. Much to his surprised, it said the exact same thing as the last one! And, not only that, it was exactly the same down to the penmanship. It was photocopied and then cut-out! It was probably part of a mass-production of these notes. However, the handwriting looked familiar, and he knew it just as well as Times New Roman on his papers and books; but, he just couldn't put his finger on whose handwriting it was. Immediately, Lavi threw that note out. Hoping that it wasn't the same, he picked up another one.

And another one. And another. And another.

But, they were all the same! What was going on? _'Crack,_' there goes Lavi's previous hopes and predictions. He whimpered. Oh, how cruel the world can be. Finally, Lavi had only one more note left from the formerly giant pile of folded notes. Maybe, just maybe, this last one would be different. With a trembling hand, Lavi picked up the not, unfolded it, and . . .

Nope.

"Ah . . ." Lavi sighed as if a giant metaphorical arrow had struck the side of his head, which, technically, one just did. _Whoever sent these must be persistent, _Lavi thought, gripping the cursed remaining note. _Well . . . I can always go. It could be important, since the writer did do a rush job trying to tell me . . . And stuff . . . _

Lavi stood up. _Well . . . I should really go. What's the worst thing that could happen?_ He just wanted to see what all of these notes were about. So, with the last note in hand, Lavi marched out of his apartment, leaving a paper mess in and around the trash and recycling bins.

But, now that he is here, Lavi is starting to rethink his decision. Even though it's his birthday, he still has quite a lot to catch-up on. But, whoever sent all those notes must have really wanted him to go to the address. The redhead scrunches the note up and shoves it deep into his pocket. It's too late now that he has walked up to the door and rang the doorbell. He stands at the door, patiently waiting for the door to open and running dozens of possibilities through his head.

And none of them are the same result as what he gets.

_Paah~!_

Before Lavi could react, he sees two faces beaming and colorful strings flying into his face. Then, there is a welcoming small _'fwee!'_ and something endearingly tickles his nose.

"Happy birthday, Lavi!" two familiar voices greet him, and then start singing a short, out-of-tune birthday song afterward.

Lavi blinks, and then grins. "Allen! Lenalee!" he exclaims.

In front of him are two people that he calls best friends ever since they first met in one of those funky K-12 grades schools. One is a short British boy, Allen Walker, who is holding a small party popper with colorful string still hanging out from its opening. The other is a Chinese girl with long, dark pigtails, Lenalee Lee, who is holding a green party blower with its end still in her smiling mouth.

"Well, don't just smile and stand there like an idiot! Come in!" Allen orders, he and Lenalee stepping out of the way to let Lavi in.

The redhead walks in, still grinning. "Hi, guys," he greets. "Why are you guys here?" he asks, knowing quite well that his neighborhood is almost a whole half an hour from Allen and Lenalee's home. So, Lavi is very surprised that Lenalee and Allen are in a home just a few blocks from his apartment. "You guys didn't kick out the residents, did you?" he asks suspiciously, narrowing his eyes.

"Because we want to celebrate your birthday!" Lenalee answers as Allen comments, offended, "Do you really have that little faith in us?" The Chinese girl shoves the party blower into her pocket as she continues, "I know this is a brand new address to you, but Allen and Mr. Cross moved into this house. So, not only are we celebrating for your birthday, but also for Allen's move!" She pulls out a New Year's clacker and starts spinning it, giggling quietly as she sees Lavi's bewildered expression.

"Aw, but, won't you get lonely without Allen and me?" Lavi asks.

"Don't worry! I have Brother," she assures. "Now, c'mon! Let's go celebrate! Allen baked a really good strawberry cake!" she urges, wrapping her arms around Lavi's arm and tugging it lightly.

"Ah, but I have a lot of things to do . . ." Lavi pouts. However, the childish half-tantrum look on his face quickly turns back into his notable, goofy grin. "Oh well, I'm just going to procrastinate then."

"When do you not?" Allen accuses.

"Heh, you're right," Lavi concludes. He pauses and glances around with confusion. "He, where's Yû?" he questions when he notices that one of his best friends isn't present.

Allen flinches as if just saying the name is some sort of curse. "Oh . . . Him . . ." he growls, saying the pronoun with such venom that anyone would think that he is talking about the World War II evil genius, Hitler. "We tried to get him to join us, but he just gave us a 'chi' and walked off. 'Why would I join you idiots to go celebrate Baka Usagi's birthday?' he said. 'I have better things to do than listen to you annoy the hell out of me.'" Allen imitates, his gray eyes sparking with flames of outrage. "GRAH! That JERK!" he roars, throwing his arms up into the air as he explodes with anger.

"Oh . . ." Lavi sighs, frowning. "Oh well, that's okay. It IS Yû we're talking about!" he laughs.

Lenalee stands there, sighing as she watches Lavi joke around. She knows that Lavi is a very sociable person, but he still doesn't have that many lasting friendships. Finding that Kanda doesn't even say 'happy birthday' or even a small 'hi' to a friend is very offensive. What's more mean that ignoring someone's existence? Especially a friend's . . .

"Hey! Lenalee, I've been wondering," Lavi says, waving a hand in front of the girl's face, "what about your brother? Where's he?"

"Hmm? Oh, I left a note to him that says where I am," Lenalee replies, confused. "Why?"

Allen and Lavi exchange worried glances, their faces pale. "All hell will turn loose . . ." they remark, horrified as if the world is ending in the next four seconds.

"What?" Lenalee asks.

Just when the two are about to reply, they are interrupted by a wailing outside. "Lenaleeeeeee!" a male voice cries outside. "Why have you left your dear brother for two guys? Your brother will not allow sooo!"

Suddenly, the front door is blown away, catching the three's attention. The door flies off its hinges, sending chips of wood and plaster all over the place. It's like a dramatic entrance in an action-packed spy movie with plenty of explosions. And then, at the doorway is a silhouette of a man.

There, standing through the falling dust, is Komui Lee, the most insane scientist anybody will ever meet. Chief Inspector of the notorious Black Order School Science Department. The over-protective, sister-complex big brother of Lenalee Lee.

Komui stands with great dignity with his chest buffed out, legs spread out like he's bracing for a fight, and his chin held high. His purple-colored hair is flecked and tinted with white plaster. His cap slides down his head, moved by the explosion. Sunlight glints and flashes off his thing, rectangular glasses. Sharp. Woodchips cling onto his white lab coat, which is being blown back by dramatic winds. And, in this crazy man's hands is a giant gun-laser-canon-invention-thing, read and cocked to aim and shoot.

Yep, it's the perfect picture of a movie-style entrance.

Only if someone would edit off his spineless, betrayed puppy-face off

"Lenalee!" he cries, holding up his strange, newly invented "weapon." "H-how could you?"

"B-Brother!" Lenalee stutters while her friends sigh and shake their heads with disbelief. "W-why?"

"I have come to save you from these Neanderthals, dear Sister!" Komui cries as if that excuses him from his current actions.

"Oh . . . Brother . . ." Lenalee sighs, trying not to show that her brother's antics are really getting out of hand. After all, he only means for the best. He just doesn't think about what's really going on. "Brother, it's just a birthday party for my friend and a celebration for Allen's new home. You don't need to freak out over it."

"I don't care!" Komui shouts. "You're hanging around two boys who might hurt you! And you're so far from home!"

"Brother! It's just Allen and Lavi! You know we have been friends since we were little," Lenalee explains, persisting.

But, Komui already stops listening. He grabs his sister's arm and drags her out through the busted door. "But, I'm concerned about your safety!" Komui argues. "And, you're cell phone isn't working anymore!"

"B-Brother! It's just the caller ID that isn't working anymore! And, we still haven't started celebrating too! I didn't even give Lavi his birthday present!" Lenalee begs. "Brother!" she whines as she is forced into Komui's car and driven away.

"There he goes again . . ." Lavi remarks, sighing. "I don't think I'm feeling bad for her anymore . . . I'm getting too use to this . . ."

Allen nods, agreeing. "Yep, but Mr. Komui sure makes this all interesting . . ."

* * *

><p>Lenalee sighs as she played with a red gift card in front of her. She is sitting at her desk with her desk light glaring down upon a sheet of paper that lies on the table. The room is dark, so the paper hurt her eyes if she stares too long.<p>

She has to find a way to get Lavi her present; her brother didn't allow her so earlier, even though he had meant for the better. She could always send it through mail, like she usually does. However, she didn't prepare a card to go along with it – she had planned to throw Lavi a party instead. Or, when she is going to get that new phone that Komui forcibly wanted to give her, she could try to give Lavi it that way. But, she can't be sure that they will go to Lavi's neighborhood. It sucks that she had failed the Drivers' Ed. class last year. Lenalee could always give the present to Allen to give to the redhead, but that might defeat the whole purpose of the present!

She slams her head onto the desk, groaning quietly and hoping that her brother hadn't heard. She feels awfully picky about this subject, but it's not every day that Lavi will have a birthday, much less turn 21. She wants to make this special, especially since she wasn't able to participate at Lavi's graduation either (again, for the same reason why she couldn't at his birthday "party" earlier).

So, she needs to think up something special . . . Something that would make-up the events before.

Suddenly, her phone starts emitting a small tune, vibrating also so it dances on top of the desktop. Lenalee lifts up her head, tired and stressed. She brings her hand over and picks up the phone, snapping it open and placing it up to her ear. "Hello?" she says, wondering who is calling her.

"Oi! Lenalee! How ya doin'?" a cheerful voice greets, a smile evident by the tone.

Lenalee grins. Even though the speaker didn't identify himself, she immediately recognizes who is calling her, responding, "Hi, Lavi." She leans on her other arm, lowering her voice so her over-protective brother isn't freaking out like he always does. "I'm sorry about my brother for earlier today."

"Meh, it's all right," Lavi replies, probably shrugging at the other end. "I wasn't expecting you and Allen anyway."

"Yeah," Lenalee agrees, laughing. "That's why we overstuffed your mailbox. We didn't want you to just brush it off, especially because of the new address," she explains. Then she hears Lavi groan into the phone and a muffled 'kunk.' "What is it?" she asks, worried.

"You two dashing my dreams and hopes too?" Lavi asks, grumbling and, probably, slumping over a desk. "One note would do the trick and you could have just signed your names on it!" he whines.

"But, then, it wouldn't be a surprise!" Lenalee argues. "Plus, it's your own fault that your head was in the gutters!"

"Aw, but," Lavi complains, "whyyy? You two are so cruel sometimes!"

Lenalee giggles, rolling her eyes at her friend's behavior. "Anyway, why are you calling?" she asks, already predicting the 'excuse' or 'explanation' before Lavi can reply. Sometimes, her friends can be so predictable.

"Calling just to say hi," Lavi answers in a deadpan manner.

"And to procrastinate?" Lenalee adds.

"Maybe . . ." Lavi says, pouting.

The Chinese girl sighs. "That sort of attitude is going to get you fired or something someday," she warns.

"Unless you can get away with it and do it right," Lavi points out, smirking slyly the other end.

"Oh, Lavi," Lenalee scolds, tapping the gift card edge on the desk. She glances up from her blank paper and up at the clock, mildly surprised at how much time had passed. "Well, Lavi, I have to go to bed now. Unlike you, I still have school tomorrow," she announces, listening to the clicks from the card and the desktop. "You'll probably going to call just to say hi again tomorrow, aren't you?" she teases, waiting for the 'guilty is charged' tone in Lavi's response.

"Maybe," Lavi says, sounding like a criminal who is caught red-handed and cornered in an alleyway with no escape in sight. "Mooost likely."

She shakes her head, snickering. "Well, g'bye, then," Lenalee finishes. She waits for her friend to say a farewell before she hangs up.

_Wait, did I forget something?_ she questions, staring at the scratched, blue phone. She ponders on this subject for a while, and then snaps the phone open again, prepared to call Lavi again to tell him that her phone number will be changing.

However, before pressing any buttons, she snaps the phone shut again. A plotting grin inches up onto her facial expression as she runs through her scheme again. She will be saving that gift card for next year.

Because she just thought up something much, much better.

And, it begins with a cell phone.

* * *

><p>Kanda is in a bad mood. A very, very bad mood. Well, not that he isn't always angry anyway. But, today, he feels even more angry and vexed than normal. He really doesn't know why, but he has hunch that says that somebody is going to annoy the hell out of him. He starts grumbling curses and swears in Japanese, clearly "not" attracting a lot of attention.<p>

Yû Kanda. The most spiteful, hateful person there is. He shoves people away, rarely says anything unless it's an insult, and he hates almost everything and everybody. He's definitely one of the friends that you would want to be with. Not only that, he has a large scowl that almost never disappears from his face, as if it was painted on permanently.

"Kanda!"

_Oh, great! Now I'm imagining voices!_ he thinks, growling as he continues to stomp his way to school. _This REALLY helps my mood!_

"Kanda!"

Suddenly, a Chinese girl dressed in a black school uniform – a fellow student from his school, the Black Order – slides in front of the teenager, stopping him in his tracks. She keels forward, leaning on her knees with her arms supporting her up. She looks up, smiling and panting. "Hi, Kanda," she greets, holding up a hand for a small wave.

"What is it?" Kanda glowers, thinking, _Oh, so I wasn't imagining it . . ._

Lenalee straightens up, taking a deep breath. She smiles again and stretches out a hand. "I want to give you something," she explains, pointing with another hand at the small device that is in her hand.

Kanda raises an eyebrow as he scrutinizes whatever the thing is. It's a blue rectangular metal object with a cracked screen. There's a thick, plastic antennae thing coming out of the right, top corner. Hanging off of the lift corner, there are three small ornaments: one is a white bunny with its ears sticking up, another is a brown puppy with large eyes and flopping ears, and the last one is a polar bear.

"What is it?" Kanda demands, pointing.

"It's a cell phone, Kanda," Lenalee explains. She reaches into her pocket and takes out a pink, thin cell phone. There are ornaments hanging off of it too: the bunny, the polar bear, and, instead of the puppy, a glaring, black cat. "You use it to receive calls or call other people," she states.

"What?" Kanda repeats, opening and closing the flip phone. He stares questioningly, glaring at the device. "What are all these numbers doing here?" he asks.

"You've never used a phone, have you?" Lenalee accuses, sighing.

"Yeah, so?" Kanda snaps. "Here," he grunts, shoving the phone back to Lenalee, "if I've never needed a phone, then I have no use for a cell phone."

"No, no! You'll need it later in life!" Lenalee places the phone back into Kanda's hand. "Plus, it's my old phone. Brother bought me another one, so it's okay!" she persists. "We even got the phone bills for this phone transferred to Mr. Tiedoll!"

"No," he huffs, shoving the phone back to Lenalee like a hot potato. "I don't even know how to use this thing anyway."

"Then, here, I'll show you how to use it," she offers, opening the cell phone up. The screen starts flashing, "welcoming" the two high school students. "The green button is 'call,' and the red button is 'hanging up,' hence the symbols. The numbers are for punching in phone numbers. If you want to pick up a call, you just open it up. When you want to hang up, you just close it. If you want to call somebody, you punch in the number and press the green button." She pauses, looking up and asking, "Do you get it?"

Kanda nods slowly, his brain still trying to process all the basic functions on how to use the cellular device. It is too confusing, and there are "too many" things to remember. He always hated all these new technological advances . . .

Lenalee nods once, a satisfied grin crossing her face. "All right. Good," she says. "Then, can I ask you a favor?" she asks, slipping the cell phone into Kanda's hand. She knows that he is still trying to swim around this, and she is planning to use this is as a way to get what she wants. "I'll be counting on you about this."

Kanda just nods again, clearly not realizing what he's getting into. He's still having trouble with the information on how technology in general works. He never really is good in computer class. _Stupid inventions . . ._ he curses.

"Thanks!" Lenalee exclaims. "I want you to pick up every call and—"

"_Ding! Ding! Ding!"_

The school bell rings loudly, easily covering up Lenalee's statement. "Ah, sorry! Time to go to class!" Lenalee apologizes, digging through her pocket again and taking out a charger. "Thank you very much, Kanda! You're doing such a big favor. I'm counting on you!" she calls, dashing off and turning briefly to wave good-bye.

Kanda blinks dumbly, staring off into the space where Lenalee had run off to. Then, he looks at the contraption in his hand. There it is. A piece of technology that he had thought he would never use. But, now, not only is her forced to have one, but also, he has to pick up every damned call for whatever reason that he didn't hear.

And this . . .

Ticks him off.

More than anything in his entire life.

* * *

><p>Kanda glowers at the cell phone that is connected to the charger that is sticking into the electrical outlet above his desk. He had spent so much time trying to figure out what the charger is supposed to be. Since he uses a laptop, it didn't take more than 15 minutes. He fumes silently, clenching and unclenching his fists; curses and swears running through his head. He hates it. Absolutely hates this abomination.<p>

He sighs, growling at the piece of technology even though he won't get any satisfying reactions. It's now his duty that he promised/agreed/forced that he will pick up every call for some reason unknown. Dang, that Lenalee.

The student reaches into his black backpack, shuffling through books for his homework. Again, only because he's obligated to do so by Tiedoll. He really sees no point in all of the work loads, but since he can't graduate unless he does do the work . . .

The phone starts ringing, playing a chipper tone as it vibrates across the table. It's so annoying, which made him angrier than before. Reluctantly, Kanda pulls the charger off the phone and flips it open and puts it up to his ear.

And the next thing he knows . . .

"Oi! Lenalee! How ya doin'?"

"Chi!" Kanda snaps softly. He would love to just scream into the device, "I'm not Lenalee! You idiot!" However, he isn't sure who is on the other end, but just hearing that obnoxious voice makes. Him. So. Angry! So, he simply pauses for a few seconds and replies, "I'm sorry. You must have the wrong number."

"Huh?" Kanda hears, "What do you mean?"

There is a pause.

"Yû?"

"Rabi?" Kanda shouts, finally recognizing that pesky, happy tone. He knows quite well that, besides his adoptive father, Tiedoll, there is only one other person who calls him by his first name. And gets away with it with only a broken arm.

"Oh! It is Yû!" Lavi exclaims, his tone announcing to the world that he's smiling like crazy. "Long time no talk! How ya—"

"Shut up," Kanda interrupts, huffing irritably. "I don't have the time to listen to your pointless antics."

"Aw! That's mean, Y—"

And Kanda snaps the phone close.

* * *

><p>Lavi blinks and stares at the phone. <em>He hung up on me,<em> he notes, shrugging. This is Yû after all. It actually went a lot smoother than he had originally thought. However, Lavi is still disappointed that Kanda didn't take just a few minutes out of his time to at least chat with Lavi. Kanda didn't even say, "Hi" or even, "Happy late birthday!" Not like he would say those sorts of things in the first place.

But, something keeps nagging Lavi: he didn't know that Kanda has a cell phone! He doesn't even use a regular phone. So, why does he have one now? But, then again, why did Kanda pick up Lenalee's phone? Maybe she had asked him to pick up. Or something like that.

So, the only way to find out is to call again.

Lavi holds the phone up to his ear again, listening to the phone ring as he waits for somebody to pick up. Finally, he is able to say, "Oi!" with a giant grin on his face.

"What do you want?" a masculine voice snaps, a pretty heavy Japanese accent lacing his words.

"Yû!" Lavi exclaims. "Why did you steal Lenalee's phone?"

"Stupid rabbit . . ." Kanda grunts. "She just shoved the phone to e and told me to pick up every single call."

"So . . . Lenalee gave you her phone as some sort of present . . .?" Lavi infers.

"Yeah, Baka Usagi, why else?" Kanda grumbles. "If this is all that you want to ask, then bye." Following the rude words is snap from when Kanda closes the phone, leaving Lavi with his mouth open to say something.

The redhead sighs and shuts the phone too. He was about to ask what Lenalee's new number is, but he doubts Kanda even knows. By the sound of it, Kanda probably doesn't know why Lenalee gave her phone to him in the first place. Oh well, Lavi can always find another way to get the information he needs.

Plus, now Lavi can annoy Kanda, thanks to Lenalee. Even though he no longer knows what her motives might be.

* * *

><p>Kanda stomps his way through the school hallways, barely noticing people trying to stay away from him and sending death glares to the others that still didn't learn to flee away from his presence. He growls, bumping into a little freshman girl. He shoots a warning glare, sending her squeaking away. Normally, the corridors are noisy and bustling, but when Kanda is added to the equation, it equals dark aura and awkward silences.<p>

Finally, he spots Lenalee talking to Allen. Not caring that he is going to interrupt, Kanda storms over with a presence that of a blizzard with a tornado and lightning. "Lenalee . . ." he grumbles with an expression of rage.

"Ba-Kanda!" Allen exclaims, fuming and glaring back at the Japanese student. "Have you not learned your manners yet?" he snaps, starting an intense glaring contest with his "presumed" friend. Allen growls and frowns, both boys ready to strange each other.

"May I help you, Kanda?" Lenalee asks politely, smiling. _I think I'm getting too used to this . . ._ she thinks, mentally sighing.

Kanda pulls away from the thundering glaring competition to face Lenalee. "I don't need this cursed chunk of metal that you call technology," he mumbles, shoving his hand into his pocket and pulls out the blue cell phone. He frowns and pushes the cell phone to Lenalee.

"Hmm? Oh! You need it!" Lenalee persists, pushing the cell phone back to Kanda. "Plus, I told you that I got Komui to move the phone bills to Mr. Tiedoll. He was thrilled when he heard that you finally accepted to have a cell phone," she explains, smiling a grin that somehow resembled Allen's notorious "poker face." "Do you want to disappoint Mr. Tiedoll? He'll cry!"

Kanda growls, reluctantly taking back the cell phone. That spineless old man is more annoying than he already is when he's crying, and Kanda won't hear the end of it when that former war general starts lecturing Kanda about being social. "And, you still want me to pick up every call?" the Japanese asks.

"Yep."

Kanda pauses, staring at the phone. "Is there some sort of 'off' switch on this thing?" he asks, hoping that he would never need the phone for the future by always keeping it off.

"Eh . . . nope," Lenalee responds. She is hesitant to lie to Kanda, but it's for the better. Plus, there technically isn't an 'off' switch for Kanda to find. "That's why the charger s essential." She shrugs, nodding. "If it runs out of batteries, it will break."

Kanda sighs, finding that he really doesn't know a way out of this cell phone nuisance. That Lenalee is starting to tick him off too. Now in a very bad mood, he storms off again, leaving Lenalee and Allen.

"What was all that for?" Allen asks, blinking.

"It's going to be Lavi's late birthday present."

* * *

><p>Lavi holds up his phone, adding a new contact on his phone and editing another one. From his vast information system (also known as Tiedoll and Allen), he had found out that Kanda's now stuck with Lenalee's old phone, and he has to pick up every single call. Wow, what luck! Now, Lavi can have some fun pestering a friend he hadn't spoken to for quite a while.<p>

The redhead quickly calls Lenalee's prior number and waits for Kanda to pick up. Only after two rings, Kanda picks up and grumbles, "What?"

"Oi! Yû-chan! How ya do—?" Lavi begins, but Kanda already has snapped the phone shut before the college graduate could finish. He sighs, scratching the top of his head as he stares at his phone. Maybe, he will have better luck next time. After all, he has other "victims" to annoy.

After all, it's only calling just to say hi.

* * *

><p>"<em>Oi! Yû-chan! How ya d—"<em>

"_Oi! Yû-chan! How ya—"_

"_Oi! Yû-chan! How y—"_

"_Oi! Yû-chan! How—"_

"_Oi! Yû-chan! Ho—"_

"_Oi! Yû-chan! H—"_

"_Oi! Yû-chan!"_

"_Oi! Yû-cha—"_

"_Oi! Yû-ch—"_

"_Oi! Yû-c—"_

"_Oi! Yû—"_

"_Oi! Y—"_

"_Oi!"_

"_O—"_

"_. . .!"_

" "

* * *

><p>"Ah, Yû-chan is being mean to me, Allen!" Lavi whines, nudging his friend's shoulder.<p>

"He's mean to everyone, Lavi," Allen points out, grumbling as he writes answers in. Lavi is supposed to be helping Allen do his Spanish homework, but, somehow, they have gotten onto the subject of cell phones and then onto Yû Kanda. "I asked him to help me on the homework before, seeing that he knows Japanese and all—"

"Knowing Japanese doesn't help someone know Spanish," Lavi points out, interrupting Allen's rant, "because it's a right-branch language, remember?"

"I don't care!" Allen snaps, his pen moving faster across his homework. "Not only that, but he's also in Spanish III while I'm only in Spanish II! GRAH! And he just BRUSHED me off, saying, "Chi, why should I help you, stupid Moyashi? Just ask Baka Usagi for help. He's fluent,'" Allen imitates, lowering his voice and putting on a "pissed off Kanda" expression.

"You make a good Yû-chan."

"DON'T LUMP ME TOGETHER WITH THE LIKES OF HIM!"

"Be Yû-chan for Halloween. You'll scare the whole neighborhood," Lavi suggests, pausing and looking at Allen's paper. "A zigzag plus a scribble isn't going to get you an A on your next report card," he clarifies, tracing his finger over the streaks, zigzags, and clouds that run through and swirl around Allen's homework.

"Wah! Lavi! Get the white-out!" Allen panics, desperately waving his arm at his side as he searches for a bottle of white-out in thin air.

Lavi sighs, handing Allen the white-out. "How in the world did you contact him anyway? He may pick up the phone, but he always hangs up before I can even say anything!"

"I would have contacted him via e-mail, save me from his presence, but he rarely ever replies. I doubt he has ever checked it since Mr. Tiedoll gave it to him," Allen comments. "So, I just caught up to him at school. He's probably the easiest person to find in the school."

"Wait, wait, wait," Lavi says. "He has an E-MAIL?" he asks, gawking.

"Yeah, remember?" Allen replies. "I got it when Mr. Tiedoll heard about the group country project in 5th grade." He sighs, shaking his head.

"R-really? I don't remember that!" the redhead exclaims. "What is it?" _So I can spam him . . . _Lavi plots.

"He really doesn't talk to you much, huh?" Allen observes. "Well, actually, I don't know it either. His e-mail address is so erratic that it's like trying to memorize pi. It's foolish to even try to remember it. I just kept it on my contacts because he had to send me something for the project." The British boy shrugs.

"Aw, that's awfully disappointing," Lavi pouts.

"Mm . . . Yeah . . ."

* * *

><p>Allen Walker sits behind his computer, yawning. He had gotten back home after school with a lot of homework stuffed in his backpack. And, to make matters worse, he has a group project with the one person he hates most. Now, Allen has a strong loathing towards Popsicle sticks with people's names on them.<p>

Unfortunately, Allen and his partner had spent more time trying to kill each other, which consisted of threats, names, and, at one point, strangling each other until the other bit his hand. So, as anybody can probably guess, they weren't very productive. As a result, Allen and his partner ended up having to work with each other via e-mail, since they might start screaming at each other through the phone.

Allen watches his inbox as he surfs the web for information. He sighs, pounding his fist on the desk as he scans through document after document. Suddenly, a message pops up. The student moves his mouse over and clicks it, reading the words.

'_I can't find the stupid letter. And, I can't even read that President Truman diary. His handwriting sucks more than yours, Moyashi!'_ Allen sees, grumbling, "I'm Allen," after finishing it. He clicks 'reply' and starts typing a response.

'_I'm Allen, stupid. And, I still can't find McArthur's letter to the Taiwanese yet either. I'll ask Lavi for help. He might be able to read the diary too, so send me the link,'_ Allen finishes and clicks 'send.' The two had lost all formal "letters" format a long time ago, since it had started to slip into chat format and writing the extra words are a waste of time.

The British boy picks up his cell phone and dials Lavi's number. He waits for a few seconds before he hears a joyous, "Oi, Allen! How ya doin'?"

"Hi, Lavi, I'm doing fine. Thanks," he replies, grinning.

"Well, that's good. So what's the problem today?" Lavi asks.

"I need help on history. I have to make a skit with a partner, and we're having lots of problems. Seeing that you majored in history and all . . ." Allen trails off.

"You better start giving me payments, Moyashi," Lavi laughs. "This poor college graduate needs some dough."

Allen sighs, shaking his head. "Lavi, I already have to deal with Master's debts. I don't want to owe you anything," he states.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I was just kidding," Lavi drones, "I'll be there in a few minutes! See you~!"

"See you," Allen repeats, hanging up. He sets the cell phone down as he starts searching again while he waits. Suddenly, another message pops into Allen's inbox. He frowns, thinking, _He's so impatient!_ However, he hadn't expected the message from someone else.

'_Alma Karma . . .'_ Allen reads, raising an eyebrow. Who's that? He opens the message and frowns again. It's one of those stupid chain letters. He is about to delete the message until he reads what it says.

He grins, copying the message. He goes over and composes a message, pasting the words onto the e-mail. He writes, _'Important! Read!'_ as the subject and on top of the e-mail. He presses 'send' when he's done, getting up when he hears the doorbell.

It's a message to Kanda.

A message that has simple words.

* * *

><p>"Damn it all . . ." Kanda grumbles, clicking away. He's getting impatient, and he doesn't care anymore if he and Allen get a stupid F. This project is dumb anyway.<p>

However, before Kanda could write anything, a message pops up in his mailbox. _Finally . . ._ he thinks, opening the e-mail. Much to his displeasure, it isn't what he expects, which he frowns upon.

It's just an excerpt of a chain letter.

And it begins with a cartoon of a stick figure holding out a red heart to another stick figure.

'_I don't have much, but I hope this is enough.'_

It's just a bunch of words strung together into small quotes. Simple. Plain and simple.

"_The antidote for fifty enemies is one friend." —Aristotle_

"_A good friend is cheaper than therapy."_

"_Give your enemy a million chances to be your friend. And give your friend no chances to be your enemy."_

"_People are those who ask for your number. But friends are those who ask you for their number."_

"_People are those who call when they need something. Friends are those who start calling just to say hi."_

Kanda frowns, rolling his eyes. _Then, friends are just dependent, annoying idiots,_ he thinks, immediately deleting the message, _who just wants to—_

His phone rings cut off his train of thought, making him growl more. He picks up the phone and immediately receives, "Oi! Yû-chan! How ya doin'?"

"About time, Baka Usagi," Kanda grumbles, "I thought you'd never call."

"Wait . . . Yû-chan . . . you still there? You didn't hang up yet?" Lavi asks.

"Yeah, why would I?" Kanda grunts.

Then, he hears Lavi yell, "Moyashi! Moyashi! Yû-chan didn't hang up!" And this is followed by, "Yeah, I told you. Now, give me my money." And then a, "Nooooo!" sound comes right after.

"Baka Usagi, Moyashi, quit acting stupid," Kanda growls, "we need to finish that damn history homework."

"Aw! That's mean!" Lavi whines.

* * *

><p>'<em>Calling just to say hi . . .'<em>

'_. . .'_

'_Thank you for being my friend . . .'_

'_Damn Baka Usagi.'_


End file.
